Assets from Surrey Pimp seized

A Surrey pimp has had hundreds of thousands of pounds worth of assets seized this morning after Police investigations found him profiting from illegal activities. Davy Tang was stripped of more than  £600,000 at Guildford Crown Court when investigators found he was profiting from soliciting prositutes from his London based 'Scandal Babes' escort agency business.

Bremen claim scalp over Chelsea

Werder Bremen have claimed an important scalp in the Champions league over Premiership Kings Chelsea. In a match similar to United's defeat last night Bremen turned the screws by securing a 1 - 0 win over the Premiership Champions. A single goal from Per Mertersacker's head secured them a powerful lead going into half time. But the decision from the referee which led to the goal from a freekick was dubious. Chelsea battled hard in the second half but were outwitted by Bremen over the ninety minutes.

Veteran leader aims nuclear fire

After Feisty Tory leader David Cameron's performance in the Queens Speech last week, Mr Punch appeared somewhat punch drunk in PrimeMinister's Question Time today. Mr Punch, who has been hammering Blair in PMQ's appeared to sober up today and offered a rest bite to Tony Blair as the Tory leaderwent on the current situation in Afghanistan and how the UN would contribute to peace keeping in the region. He offered Blair solidarity and praised the work done by British troops.

Wolves In Sheep's Clothing

If anyone was in any doubt about the duplicitous nature of the Liberal Democrat Party they would do well to take a closer look at what it does with power, entrusted to them by a misguided and beguiled public, at local council level. In fact, events earlier this year which struck at the heart of the Liberal Democrat leadership, unmasked the backstabbing, disloyal trait of a political machine desperate to achieve tangible influence at Westminster and in the country, at any cost.

Virgin Boss v Media Mogul

Let battle commence in the wars of the tycoons! A multi million pound business man has slammed a billionaire media mogul for manopolising the media. Sir Richard Branson, who owns the billion dollar Virgin label has launched a scathing attack on Rupert and James Murdoch,(Father and Son) who own top selling newspapers such as The Sun, The Times and BSKYB. Branson claims that the Murdoch empire is making a dent on democracy and he urges the government to 'stand up' to him.

Celtic produce surprise win over United

Scottish giants Celtic turned the screws on premiership leaders Manchester United tonight. The game ended in a 1 - 0 win for Celtic as United dominated the first half but failed to capitalise on missed chances. In the second half, Celtic managed to increase the pace of the game and a fabulous freekick from Japanese Shunsuke Nakamura created a roar of intense emotion from the Scottish fans. Manchester United were awarded a penalty in the dying minutes which was squandered by Louis Saha. Celtic's win means that they qualify for the last 16 of the Champions League.

Legendary Hollywood Director has died

A revolutionary Hollywood Director has died his production company disclosed today. Robert Altman, 81, revealed in March that he had had a heart transplant, but the cause of his death on Monday has not been revealed. The maverick director directed several avant garde movies including War movies such as 'Mash' and the Western 'McCabe' which contributed to the 1970's being described as the 'second golden age of Hollywood.' He was nominated for best director several times including the British based 'Gosford Park, ' but never won.

Patients denied Alzeimer's drugs on NHS

Shocking plans to restrict the use of patients using Alzeimer's drugs on the NHS will be challenged in court by two drugs companies it emerged last week. Eisai and Pfizer will seek a judicial review of a decsion by The National Institute for Health and Clinical Excellence (NICE) to deny patients using Aricept, Exelon and Reminyl on the NHS. Rebecca Wood, Chief Executive of The Alzeimer's Research Trust, said: 'NICE'S wrong headed decision has been an apalling insult to the thousands of families up and down the country who have been blighted by Alzeimer's.'

X Factor judge turns down bit part in comic show

An X Factor judge has turned down a cameo role in a TV comic show. Simon Cowell refused to play a bit part in Ricky Gervais's comic genius show Extras because he could not sing. The stern faced judge who slams singers week in week out on the Saturday night talent show was worried that his singing voice would not go down very well with the last episode. Other famous faces have appeared on the comic show including movie actor Robert De Niro.

A Flight to Savannah: Part III

Part III: Lost marriage licences, stewards, and war-paint.


There is another announcement from our captain. He says, in a slightly worried American accent:  "Sorry to interrupt your flight but one of the ladies on the flight has lost her marriage licence out of her passport. She still wants to stay married, so if you see it on the floor can you please pass it on to an attendant and hopefully we can save her marriage."