James Combes's blog

Alco-pop addicted fund managers, weasels and a 10 point plan

James Combes - The-Latest comedy writer

The world is facing a tipping point. Oil, gas and Linford Christie are all running out. In the Third World, clean water and food is increasingly scarce. A world-wide credit crunch has ensured that the UK has its highest unemployment figures since the 1980s. Scarcity has become the watch-word of the early 21st century. In fact, it seems that scarcity is so prevalent in modern times that it is in danger of being devalued.

Government wobbles over trolley technology

James Combes - The-Latest comedy writer

Modern technology is a wonderful thing. It has supplied the human race with revolutionary innovations such as the wheel, the yoghurt maker, and of course, Velcro. But these inventions are small fry indeed when compared to the pinnacle of human achievement itself: The automatic wheel-locking system on the Tesco trolley.

Where's a dentist when you need one?

Lack of access to National Health Service (NHS) dental care remains a thorny issue for many living in the UK. A recent survey revealed that one in three people could not get NHS treatment, with six per cent of the population doing their own repairs which included using household glue to stick down a filling or crown. Satirist James Combes provides a tongue in cheek look at the NHS dentist as an "endangered species".

The tale of the artistic physio

There was a young lady called M. She was a bright young spark and was a student of many different disciplines. Not only was she a qualified physiotherapist but she also had an art degree. Two seemingly disparate subjects that couldn't possibly ever complement each other, or so it seemed. But M, the tiny-toed, bright young thing, knew perfectly well that two different subjects from utterly opposing ends of the intellectual spectrum were not a hindrance: they were mutually beneficial. She set out to prove to her sceptical tutors that this was the case.

The honest train driver

The Piccadilly Line tube-train pulls into the station. Here it stops, as indeed it should  — it's a train, after all. As the doors open, some passengers leave and some join. But the doors remain open, all goes quiet and there is no sign that any movement is likely to happen in the near future.  

It's five minutes later and the train still resides in the same spot, in the same station. The doors have yet to close.

The upside of flooding

James Combes

Nuclear peril of freeview Tv

James Combes


Digital television...I can't seem to get the hang of it. A voice comes on at the end of a programme saying  "for more information press the red button". Well I tried it  — several times …it just turned the television off.

Trendy Shoes

Trendy Shoes.

This is a very pointless blog of no real purpose at all, but I felt that this web-site needed something light-hearted to break up all the serious news stuff.

It is quite simply this: in an attempt to make us all look  presentable, tidy and reasonably human, my boss has  used company funds to buy us all identical uniform. There's nothing particularly revelatory about this - it happens every year. For the most part this is a good thing - free clothes, thanks very much.

Valentine's Day grump

Valentine's Day Grump.

Next Wednesday I am going to hibernate in a Scrooge-type fashion as Valentine's Day comes upon us. I shall hide from the lovey-dovey couples  so delightfully exchanging saliva in public and read a book instead.

Thought for the day

Thought for the day.

Flattery will get you anywhere, a fact that Network Rail is justly envious of.